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Welcome back kiddies! This past week I went human hunting and caught me a Tim Seeley. So I put him in a box and carried it down into the dungeon. So go on and take a look at what he had to say when I found out he wasn’t dead, and he woke up to find himself trapped in the interview chair.

Alright let’s start out with a short answer section and get the usual out of the way.

Name:
Tim Seeley

Age:
32

Married/Single/Dating/Other:
I just got married!

Pets:
Two cats! Lucy and Zoey. I would have named them Fuckhorse and Ms. PurrPurrpants, but my wife named ’em.

Highest Education Level:
I have a BFA in Illustration from the University of Wisconsin-Eau Claire. La Dee Da!

High School Mascot:
A pine tree. Lame.

First Job:
Burger King whopper maker.

Favorite place to get a bite to eat:
Not Burger King. Any Thai or Sushi place will do fine by me.

Staying with short answers, let’s talk about what you do:
Comic(s) you created Before 1999:
Nothing you’ll ever hear about again.

January 1, 2000 – January 2, 2003:
Lovebunny and Mr. Hell, Kore, and G.I.Joe!

January 3, 2003 – Today:
Hack/Slash, Forgotten Realms, Halloween, Exiles and Wildcats.

Alright all that stuff aside, let’s get to the meat of the interview:

What do you do when not making comics?
Bike, eat, make custom action figures, watch lots of movies and read the occasional book.

Favorite place to shop in person and online?
Quake Toys in Chicago… they have everything an 80s toy nerd could want. Online, I like Amazon, I s’pose.

You’re in the desert, when BOOM! Engine blows and you’re stranded. What do you do while you’re stuck in the desert for 4 days?
Masturbate to conserve water. Err… wait.

When you were 15, what were you for Halloween?
I believe that was the year I was too old to trick or treat but too young to be cool again by dressing up. So, my guess is I went as a lonely bored kid from Wisconsin.

Favorite comic character when you were 10, 20 and 30?
10: Spider-Man
20: Cyberfrog
30: Animal-Man

If you got served, what would you do?
Lay down and die from the shame.

Back to comic stuff for now. Knowing that Iceman is the greatest hero of all time, why do you think he is so underused?
Because he just ain’t the same with Spidey, Firestar and Ms. Lion.

Alright, you’re making a comic about a team of chickens who are trying to bring down a large corporation. What’s the name of the book, and sell me on a quick pitch? Go!
It’s called “LIVE FREE AND DYE EGGS” and we find the team of chickens, each with her own military special must overcome their dark, mysterious pasts to take down the sinister Dr. Paas, a rabbit bent on turning the chicken’s children into tasty, colorful Easter morning treats.

We all know how good you can write and draw, but what do you really want to be when you grow up?
A lesbian.

Where is the real money at in comic creating?
Being Todd McFarlane.

When you’re making comics, what’s going on around you? Music, what kind? Silence? TV on?
I listening to a lot of indy music off the internet. WOXY mostly.

10 years from now. Where do you see yourself?
On a couch. Still watching episodes of 80s He-Man cartoons and realizing how sad it is for a 42 year old man to be watching them.

What do you know about the process of making Dill Pickles?
I’m from Wisconsin, man. We pickled fucking beets and rutabagas. Dill cukes are pedestrian!

Alright, we can finish up with a quick word association game. I will say a word, you give me a quick one sentence response.

Hack/Slash?
Stress. Must finish script before honeymoon.

Snake Eyes?
Dude, how do you make Snake Eyes suck? I dunno… but the movie did it.

Horror Comics?
Ahh… a welcome respite from men in tights.

Jack the Ripper?
Now there’s a guy who could have really benefitted from watching The View.

Christina Applegate?
When I was like 11 or 12 I cut out a picture of her from the National Enquirer and hung it on my bulletin board. She had torn pants and an eagee.

Sea Lions?
When I was in San Francisco on vacation, a bunch had taken over a pier. They smell horrible. But they’re fun to watch.

Smurfs?
When I was in San Francisco on vacation, a bunch had taken over a pier. They smell horrible. But they’re fun to watch.

Decapitated Dan?
All I know is he posts on boards as puyabusto or something. I think that word is Spanish for “eating so many chimichangas that your spleen prolapses.”

Tim Seeley?
That dude drinks way too many Iced Soy Chai Lattes to be male.

Thanks so much Tim.

To learn more about Tim and to see what he is up to, please check out http://www.timseeley.com/

Decapitated Dan
decapitateddan@comicattack.net