May 15, 2010

Ye Olde School Cafe’: Wolverine Classic Vol. 2 pt 1

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Written by: Billy
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Welcome back to another week of a classic story retold as I see it! The last two weeks, we saw Wolverine as his alter-ego “Patch,” hanging out and getting into some bloody battles in the seedy underground of Madripoor. This week we’ll continue down that path and finish off the story line involving Roughouse and Bloodscream. We’ll also hear about Patch’s first meeting with Joe Fixit, A.K.A. the Hulk! Chris Claremont and John Buscema were really on a roll with this title, and the more you read it, the more you believe it. Let’s get to the action right now!

We first see Karma all dressed to kill wearing her best “love me for my mind” outfit. She’s trying to distract the guards long enough to enthrall one of them and gain access to the building. She does just that, but eventually loses control over the guard’s mind. Luckily for her, Patch is hiding behindĀ a curtain and breaks the guard’s jaw. Karma tells Patch that her uncle has captured both Jessica and Lindsay. They make a quick exit, and then we see General Coy treating Lindsay like a slave. Before you know it, Patch slashes Bloodscream’s neck and drops him, but then Roughouse tosses him out a window. The two of them engage in quite a brawl and Patch starts to get the worst of it. When all seems lost however, Jessica and Tyger Tiger get into the act and give Roughouse and Bloodscream a beating. This leaves Coy without protection, and Patch is about to give him a whooping he’ll never forget. Before he can though, the Prince steps in and tells Patch that he will decide who gets executed.

Next, we see the Hulk make his entrance. Meanwhile, the Prince lets Patch and his friends go without any trouble, but takes Lindsay for a walk. Jessica tells Patch to do something, but he realizes they’re badly outnumbered, so he takes the Prince at his word for now. The next scene shows Mr. Fixit arriving, and immediately some punks start up with him. They find out quickly that he isn’t the forgiving type. He dispatches them in the blink of an eye, and then we see Patch and Tyger having a conversation about the Prince. The Prince then tells Lindsay he has the hots for her, and she’s quite impressed by his collection of her memorabilia. Roughouse is still trying to cause trouble, but Patch and Karma make sure he doesn’t even get a chance to get going. They knock him out before he starts any trouble.

In the following scene, we see Mr. Fixit meet Patch at the airport for the first time. The two men have to join forces unwillingly at first to fight a gang trying to kill them. Mr. Fixit gets shot right in the face, and then uses his fists to show the gang the error of their ways. He even grabs a grenade in the palm of his hand and it goes off! After the action, Patch follows Mr. Fixit to his hotel and sees his transformation and discovers his secret.

Mr. Fixit awakens the next morning to find his room and clothing slashed to pieces and a note that tells him to get out of town. He immediately finds some clothes that aren’t ripped up and makes his way to The Princess Bar. He man-handles O’Donnell to get information on Patch, but he’s right in the bar waiting for him. The two talk about where they need to go to get some action, and then they do. They arrive at an establishment where some chicks are being held against their will. Of course they beat-down some thugs and set the girls free. Patch tells Mr. Fixit that there’s more the next day, and the two go off to find some more corruption. Little does Fixit know though, that Patch is setting him up. The two reach an abandoned building and when Fixit isn’t looking, Patch slices through a part of the balcony and the weight of Fixit breaks the floor and he falls down a cliff. This is just some payback for a beating the Hulk gave Wolverine a few years back. When Fixit makes it back topside, he tells Patch he’s going to get a beating for that.

Patch then tells him that he’s been played from the beginning though, and this is confirmed when General Coy shows up. Fixit then finds out that his boss that sent him there on a job was tricked by Coy. They wanted to use him as muscle to stop Patch and any other trouble with the Prince and his army. Fixit tells them that he doesn’t do mob work and then tries to goad them into a fight. Coy is no fool, and he and his men back down. Fixit then in turn punches Patch for his troubles. The next day we see Patch putting Joe Fixit on an airplane, which is supposed to be a nighttime flight, but Patch tricked him into the wrong daytime flight. He does this just to tick him off, and it works. The last frame shows Fixit screaming Patch’s name as the airplane flies into a sunrise.

Well, that’s it for part one of volume number two. Stay tuned for next week’s conclusion, because it will show more slashing fun and the origin of Wolverine versus Sabretooth! See you next week!

Billy Dunleavy



  1. InfiniteSpeech

    You are so right Claremont and Buscema were on fire at this time! These stories were actually a breath of fresh air at the time and introduced us to Wolverine’s ever growing rouges gallery

  2. Billy

    @Speech- Those guys were absolutely great with these stories. They were great at developing these characters.

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